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Kicking Ass and Taking Names
Everyday I pick my two-year-old, Brynn, up from preschool and everyday I’m met with glowing reports of her sweetness. Of course she’s sweet. She’s mine and Ethan’s and between the two of us we once did something sweet*, so it stands to reason.
I was completely blindsided at pick-up yesterday when I walked into Brynn’s classroom and her teacher bombarded me with tales of her misguided behavior at school that morning. I couldn’t believe it when she told me Brynn had bitten a kid, pushed a kid, and hit a third one over the head. I was absolutely shocked to hear this. I have role-played with Brynn over and over again that when somebody does something you don’t like, kick ‘em!
What’s the point in fine tuning her conflict resolution skills if she’s going to abandon protocol when she gets into a tight spot?
I get so frustrated when she makes a mockery of the opportunities we provide her with. Does she think her American Gladiator crown is just going to win itself?
I did phone the mother of Jaws’s bite victim to see if her little one was okay and determine whether or not we needed to retain legal counsel.
To make it all better, her teacher went on to tell me that Brynn was written up and a copy of her misdeeds was placed in her file. I drop my beautiful, angelic doll off at school in the morning and by noon she has a criminal record. My dreams of universities and pedigrees humbly replaced by hopes of juvenile detention center valedictorian. Should I have capitalized that? I don’t mean any disrespect to my daughter’s like-minded colleagues. Juvenile Detention Center Valedictorian is an esteemed honor. But salutatorians? Losers.
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Jaws
Not sweet, innocent little Brynn! Say it ain't so!!! Love it!
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That sweet face? WHA?? Not possible.
And, are you gonna start blogging regularly again? Because, if so? The internet may just EXPLODE it can't take it!
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Is it coincential that she is wearing stripes or are you preparing her for eventual jail time?
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I (also) am happy to see you back in the saddle again.
"What’s the point in fine tuning her conflict resolution skills if she’s going to abandon protocol when she gets into a tight spot?" Ha!
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You blogging makes me happy!
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Straight out of my mouth a few weeks ago was the quote from Baby Boom: “If he doesn’t get into the right preschool, he won’t get into the right prep school and then we can just forget about an Ivy League college.” That post totally reminded me of that. Welcome back to the blog world, Ma'am. You've been missed.
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She's so cute! I love the, "Who, me?" look.
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OK, she was FRAMED! Look at that face! That is the face of good, not evil! And Little Man isn't into kinky stuff like biting. So I know my future daughter-in-law would never commit such a crime.
And she was written up. Seriously? Does that punishment work for toddlers? Because if so, I'm totally starting a file for Little Man at home.
Also? You're using real names now? How did this come about?
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I can't believe a preschool has a *file* on a 2-year-old. Where are kids supposed to learn to resolve conflict if not at preschool. Hence the term "pre" school: gets them ready for real school. Puh-leez!
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Ha, that is hysterical....my little one was a "pincher"
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Hey, valedictorian is valeditorian right?
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With those pigtails and big blue eyes? No way.
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Are those piggy tails for real!? Could she be any sweeter!? Loved this one, just loved it... now, more please.
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Yep, Miss Blue Eyes there looks awfully fierce to me... love that face!!
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Sounds like poor Brynn had a rough day, you should ask her teacher what was going on out of the ordinary that caused this behavior, has there been a change in the classroom recently? Don't worry, as long as she doesn't continue biting the file *shouldn't* come back to haunt her college dreams! Good luck to you, and happy to see you blogging again.
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What, a two year old hit someone? No, I don't believe it for a second. I've never heard of such a thing happening. It's a good thing they wrote her up for it - she's obviously a menace to society!
And what a cute menace she is. Seriously, she's darling!
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You are killing me.
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Hah! You made me laugh so hard, my little brother's started looking at me. Then they slowly backed away. I don't blame them, I'm ferociuos. During my pre-school day's, I was a 'biter.' I always had to go to the time-out classroom with the 'screamer', the 'whiner', the 'cryer', the 'pincher', the 'hitter' and the 'teaser'. They didn't laugh at me after the first time. Apparently, my bites hurt. A lot. There were a lot of problems at my pre-school, I suddenly relized. Wow, it's amazing I'm so normal, and not in juvie hall!
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Those big blue eyes? I don't believe it. The other kid's a liar. Call her mom back and stick it to 'er. Or else teach Brynn how to let the other kid know that if they tell, the beatings will get worse.
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She was framed!
Miss you!
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Wrote her up? Good grief. Educators have too much power. (I can say that, I R 1)
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So I confess.... I stalk your blog because it brings back all the memories of my kids at the age of your little ones.
LMAO! My first was a biter and the same thing happened... only in the church nursery. The "other" mother warned me if I didn't take care of my little "jaws" she would "knock her from here to New Mexico"... her exact words.
Katie outgrew it and grew up to be fairly adjusted. Fairly being the operative word there.
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Oh that is so funny, and with that sweet little face?
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Well Shari, in April you and I can toast to saving for parole instead of college.
My girls are the delinquents in our house. BIG time.
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Just poking around, and came across your blog. My son thinks I'm nuts; I'm laughing so hard, I'm about to have "accident." Thanks!
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Written up? Are you kidding me? My two year old girl is not a biter *yet* but if she did, her teacher would tell me about it and then keep an extra eye on her. The parents of the one bitten would be informed that it had happened, but would never tell who did it. Seriously, that sounds a little too harsh, they are practically babies. If they can't say it, they act it, simple as that.
I absolutely love you blog, your tales are fantastic! Please write more!
Oh, and I have to agree, she must have been framed. She is practically a poster girl for innocence!
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You? Are a crack up! I stumbled across your blog through another's, and had to come check it out because I loved your blog title. I'll definitely be back!
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I would definitely get legal counsel now
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I came across your blog from 'Because I Said So' page....
I just wanted to say that I think it's wonderful that you have humor in this situation.... I mayself would as well. I mean, serious and we'll deal with it.... But funny as anything! Thanks for writing about this!
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The other kid must have had chocolate on him. Or her. Couldn't have been her fault, right? Not a chance.
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The child looks like a real killer. Best to keep her out of mainstream society for awhile.
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I am dying to know if you say any of these things to the teacher, or if you stand there nodding and looking dismayed. I used to be a daycare teacher, and I would have DIED LAUGHING if any of the parents had said in a disappointed tone that they had TOLD and TOLD and TOLD the child to KICK.
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You posted this so long ago that you'll probably NEVER even read my comment, but I MUST know what "Jaws" is wearing in this picture! My kids used to wear these outfits (20-25 years ago) and I LOVED them, and I have often tried to remember the name of the designer. It was once an everyday word in my household, like, "where are your Levis?" or something. PLEASE tell me!
Thank you.
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I think the word you are looking for to describe her is FIERCE!
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She looks sweet but there is something in her eyes.
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Abandoning protocol, that is too funny! I have one that's 12 now. Always so sweet, and loving, and the most adorable child you'd want to meet, but cunning and very skilled!
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